Life as I know it… plus commentary

The one where I watch Slumdog Millionaire against my will

with 7 comments

Readers of this blog know that I had no desire to watch this movie.  I recommended a book to someone and he agreed to read it if I’d watch this movie.  Being a person of honor, I am watching the movie like I said I would, giving it a fair shot and posting my thoughts as I go.

So far this movie is grossing me out… the trash, the smells, the squalor and let’s face it, the crap are making me sick.  

OK, so I get the premise here.  He’s in trouble for cheating on Who Want to Be a Millionaire because no one believes he could know the answers to the questions.  And the reasons are his life experiences gave him the answers.  It’s kind of like Shakepeare in Love but there’s a lot more trash, squalor and crap.

OMG.  There’s chili torture in this movie.

Wait … what?  Why did they just blind that kid?  So this orphangae is maiming kids to make them better beggars?  Worst. Orphanage. Ever.

Huh.  Had no idea there were Indian hobos.

It’s a grand life living on the rails… till you fall off the train.  Magically, falling off has aged our heroes.  Salim now looks like Tito Jackson.

OK, now they’re leading lives of con games and thuggery.  Can I really get behind these guys as protagonists?

Whoa!  Salim is packin’ heat!

You just knew there had to be a call center scene in this movie.

You ever notice how the theme of finding a lost love seems to transcend culture and time?    You can find stories about this in mythology, literature, history… pretty much everywhere.  One of the most common threads in humanity’s fabric.

“I love you.”
“So what?”

OMG.  Tito Jackson has just made off with Latika!

This host is a jerk.

Whaaaaat?  I don’t buy the change of heart at all. The writer took the easy way out here.

His brother doesn’t have voicemail?

The jerk just said RUpee instead of ruPEES for the first time. 

Oh Salim.  Oh unbelievable subplot Salim.

Huh? So all is forgiven with regards to the torture?  I’d have been blabbing like an idiot all over that TV show about them shocking me.

If he cared about winning the ruPEEs just a little bit I could believe the ending a little more.

Credits… oh what the hell is this?  I’d have like the ending better if they just let the little kids dance.

OK… final impression… it was a good rental.  I admit I was hooked enough to Google the second to the last question before they finally got to it.  I definitely don’t think it was worthy of all the hype that it got…. seriously, Best Picture?

If you’re interested in such things, there’s a really neat FAQ that you can look at.


Written by arnold

May 31, 2009 at 12:27 am

Posted in Movie Reviews

7 Responses

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  1. LMAO! Excellent critique of this Academy Award winning film. 🙂


    May 31, 2009 at 8:21 pm

  2. Why thanks. 🙂 It’s easier to live blog at home. They keep throwing me and my laptop out down at the mall.


    May 31, 2009 at 8:50 pm

  3. Nice write up. What would you have picked for best picture this last year? (Tricky for you, since the two greatest movies of all time, The Dark Knight and Star Trek were just before and after the cut, respectively.)

    the kyle

    June 1, 2009 at 10:34 pm

  4. Given the choices (Benjamin Button, Frost/Nixon, Milk, and the Reader) , it probably should have won. I’ve just saying it was up to the usual level of quality a Best Picture normally is.

    Oddly, I didn’t see one of the nominees that year.


    June 1, 2009 at 10:44 pm

  5. I thought i would get more credit for watching this movie. I’ll be honest.


    June 2, 2009 at 8:20 am

  6. And by the way (said in Joey Tribiani’s voice), Yeah Dark Knight and Star Trek are the best movies of all time!


    June 2, 2009 at 8:21 am

  7. really really good job watching the movie. i really really want you to feel good about that. i know how difficult that must’ve been.

    the kyle

    June 2, 2009 at 9:46 am

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